Fire and Water
Now that our full moon in Aries has come to completion, I would like to reflect on a beautiful download that came through for me. But before I dive in, I’d like to give you a little background on Aries. Aries is where the zodiac wheel begins. It is the sign that represents the spark of creation and desire. Before we can go out and “do” something, we must first have the burning desire from within. We have all felt this before; it is that fire in your belly when you are passionate about something. Desire moves us into the action of doing, creating, accomplishing, experiencing and most of all loving.
I entered this world as an Aries moon, a fire sign by nature….I am literally made up of internal fire and burning desire to “do” is part of who I am. Some may say I am a “goal scorer by nature,” and the truth is, I am. Not in the literal sense where I am shooting and scoring a goal in a game (I’m a distance runner and an equestrian…ball sports were never my thing!), rather I see myself as a metaphysical goal scorer in that my desire to do something gives me the energy, strength, and momentum to follow through and see things through to completion. Personally, I do not see anything more attractive than being able to “score a goal.”
As an Aries moon, I am someone whose feelings and my inner world is always ablaze with intensity. Thank goodness I am surrounded by water signs to balance out this fire, because the natural blaze of Aries needs some tempering from water from time to time. There are times when I get an idea and I can literally feel it grow from a spark, to a flame to a full on smoldering blaze within my gut waiting to be revealed to the world. It is intense….
One of my biggest phobias or fears has always been fire. Interesting right? My inner world is literally electric and made of fire and desire. How could I be scared of fire? If I am myself internally hardwired to be full of fire, passion and the ability to accomplish and do hard things, how could I ever be scared of physical fire when you fight fire with fire? But how can a person be scared of what they are?
On several plant medicine journeys, I had visions of myself being burned for speaking my truth and using my voice. On one journey this came in the form of my speech and in another it was related to my writings. The messaging from these journeys is now clear to me, I was fighting fire with fire and this created a smoldering fear. I was scared of what I was, this passion and fire in my soul, until now.
Yesterday I found myself on a trail ride with Blue and I began to contemplate ways to embrace the fire that this Aries moon was calling in. It has always been especially important for me to distinguish between my internal desire from fear, since for me both originate from the spark within me. When I operate from desire I am in a feeling of flow, leading to the creation of beautiful things, including relationships and love. When I operate from fear it leads to the feeling of being stuck or stagnant, and I just stop still.
My entire life I have been known to grab the reins and take charge. When riding a horse, if you are forceful with reins or pull back, the horse will stop dead in its tracks. No progress is made, and the ride is over. In life, the more my desire got entangled with fear, I often found myself pulling or holding back and I would stop. I remained stuck and nothing was being created. I needed to find a way to balance my fire. I needed to call in another element; water.
On this ride with Blue under the Aries full moon, the reins were fluid and loose. I let him lead the way and choose where we would explore. He decided to take a turn I had not intended and when I looked up I saw a magnificent stag with a full antler rack. The stag symbolizes regeneration, grace, strength, wisdom, and spiritual evolution. Their sprawling antlers growing from the crown of their head signify nobility, authority, and their ability to shed and regrow them mirrors my transformation and new beginnings. So much could have gone wrong in this moment; Blue could have spooked, and I could have fallen off in the middle of the forest with no one to help, the stag could have felt threatened and approached us out of fear. Instead, there was an unspoken respect and trust between the three of us that we were all here in this moment to co-create something magical.
The three of us stood there and remained present in our energy for a few minutes before the stag slowly walked back into the forest and Blue and I continued our ride. I reached down to hug my horse’s neck, and he turned his head and rested his nose on my leg. My gaze was drawn to the wisdom in Blue’s left eye, and a beautiful message came through, Co-creation. Blue allowed me to see this vision of the farm long before I felt the heat of the spark. When I loosened his reins and allowed the element of water and flow to come in, Blue helped me to see this desire. He brought me to this land, and my internal fire brought it to life.
As Blue and I stopped at the top of a hill and looked back at Blue Fox Farm. We stared in amazement at what we have created in such a short time. It was then that I could see it all so clearly. Not only did Blue and I co-create this sacred space, but I surrounded myself with two additional elements of grace and flow and I was overwhelmed with a feeling of gratitude. I am blessed to spend my days on this land with my best friend, who I also consider my sister. She is the water to my fire (literally, as she is a cancer sign) and tempers my flames in the best way. It is also ironic that my nickname for her is “Ash.”
The second blessing is my partner, #30. This natural goal scorer also brings in the element of water into my life (he is a cancer sign as well!). The two of us are co-creating a life and a home with two elements that have been somewhat foreign to me; flow and ease. He too tempers me in the best ways possible.
Finally, I am grateful for this Aries full moon for allowing me to see what I intend to offer to the collective, and that is co-creation of a space that nourishes all her creatures just by existing. It is my duty and my desire to distill and harness this energy back into the world in the form of writing. I am no longer scared of this burning desire inside of me to share what comes through from Blue Fox Farm and all of the life she supports and I will no longer fight fire.
XX,
Lauren Rae
